32 Extremely Upsetting Facts About The Class Of 2017
by Dave Stopera
In a few short weeks, kids all over the country will be starting their first year of high school. These kids were by and large born in 1999, so it’s safe to assume that their high school experience will be different than yours. Here’s how…
1. They have never lived in a world with monthly texting limits.
2. Or in a world where they’ve had to look up directions and print them out.
3. Or where they weren’t able to skip through commercials.
4. Justin Timberlake was never this guy:
In fact, a lot of them have no idea who NSYNC were:
5. They are the same age as all these movies:
And the same age as Family Guy.
6. The Backstreet Boys have been a band longer than they’ve been alive.
7. They probably have no idea what’s going on in this picture:
8. Or what this thing is:
9. Or what this artifact is:
10. And the N64 is three years older than they are.
11. Destiny’s Child never had four members to them.
12. They’ve never had the paralyzing fear
that comes with picking the perfect away message.
Or the paralyzing fear that comes with picking the perfect top 8.
13. You can say with some confidence that you have MP3s older than they are.
14. For them, Star Wars has never been a trilogy.
15. They’ve never lived in a world without the “Thong Song.”
16. If you say “you sound like a broken record,”
chances are they won’t understand you.
17. Leonardo DiCaprio has never looked like the guy in this picture.
Which might be the reason why tweets like these exist:
18. Eminem is old enough to be their dad.
And Curly Sue could be their mom.
19. This sound means nothing to them.
20. They most likely have never been able to drink
these sweet, sweet beverages (and never will):
These foods too:
21. They have never received advice from Mr. Feeny.
22. Steve was never ever the guy on the left:
23. They live in a world where
Nirvana can be considered classic rock.
24. The cell phone you had when
you were their age is now in a museum:
25. They have never lived in a world without SpongeBob.
And, speaking of which, they are about
the same age as the Krusty Krab Pizza episode.
26. This building holds no significance to them.
And this mountain too:
27. There have always been over 151 Pokemon to them.
28. These people were never “teens”:
30. They can measure how old they
are by saying they’re “four Shrek movies old.”
Or by saying they’re “about two and a half Lindsay Lohan mug shots old.”
Speaking of which, they never knew this young lady:
31. They have never gone down a Discovery Zone slide.
32. Finally, this looks like something out of a fantasy novel to them:
Though, to be honest, it looks like that to me too.